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I just
Last Post 14 Dec 2012 12:32 PM by Bells. 11 Replies.
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amyjohnstonUser is Offline
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amyjohnston

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13 Dec 2012 12:59 PM
    I just watched a movie last night "the invisible war". I was told by some close people to watch this movie. Although it does not turn me away from the military I do believe all women wanting to enter the military should watch this movie and just be aware so we can better protect ourselves. This post was not meant to stir up any negativity towards the military because I am joining. Just thought I would reach out to the women on this forum and let us try our best and take care of ourselves while we serve our country.
    BellsUser is Offline
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    13 Dec 2012 03:48 PM
    I'll have to watch it but I havnt really had any problems since being in as far as needing to protect myself. The males on board treat me like a daughter or sister so it's all good.
    Take what you like and leave the rest behind.
    CoochUser is Offline
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    Cooch

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    13 Dec 2012 04:42 PM
    I don't pay attention to the other branches, but the CG has a pretty good track record when it comes to this sort of thing. I know there are a lot of sites out there that post annonymous accusations against people, but I tend to discredit those based on the fact that they are 1, anonymous, and 2, no formal charges are ever sought. It's easy to throw someone's name out on a public forum when you use an anonymous profile.

    Don't get me wrong, I am NOT discounting the fact that sexual assault happens, whether it is in the military or not. There are many victims, men AND women, that choose not to come forward and report what happened to them. In fact, men are far less likely to report a sexual assault than a woman. This is due to the added humilation that they perceive will happen to them. I was the sexual assault victim advocate at two of my units. I am proud to say that I never had to act on that role.
    You can meet the standard, or you can set the standard. It's your choice.
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    13 Dec 2012 05:01 PM
    And as a very wise person recently stated to me, "why do we only train victims on how to protect themselves, and not train perpetrators to not rape people?"
    You can meet the standard, or you can set the standard. It's your choice.
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    13 Dec 2012 05:10 PM
    The first woman that spoke in this documentary (not movie sorry) was a female in the coast guard. It was shocking but it does happen everywhere. She was the only female at her small boat station in Michigan and one thing led to another. Cooch I am glad you elaborated on the issue and I hope it doesn't happen to any of us. Male or female. Males are likely to not report it just as you described, the video shows that a lot. Just glad I am more aware of this issue then before because now I know what to look for and not put myself in situations where that would happen.
    CoochUser is Offline
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    Cooch

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    13 Dec 2012 05:24 PM
    I'm glad they discussed the male victim aspect. I take it very personally when it's portrayed as women being the only victims.

    Sadly, in many cases, there's absolutely nothing the victim could have done to prevent it. I wish it weren't so, but its the facts.
    You can meet the standard, or you can set the standard. It's your choice.
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    13 Dec 2012 05:55 PM
    Yes very true and that's the part that scares me the most.
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    13 Dec 2012 08:01 PM
    It could happen leaving the mall as easily as being in the military. It can happen in a church, in a college, in an office environment, in your own home if you have an abusive spouse. So yes, know the signs, know how to protect yourself, know when a situation looks like it could go from bad to horrible in a matter of seconds... but don't be paranoid and LOOK for something that isn't there. You could potentially ruin a mans career and life or your own if you search for something that just doesn't exist. Not saying you will... just want you to be careful, on all levels.
    Sector NY, Staten Island
    CoochUser is Offline
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    13 Dec 2012 08:18 PM
    ...or a woman's career.
    You can meet the standard, or you can set the standard. It's your choice.
    amyjohnstonUser is Offline
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    13 Dec 2012 10:34 PM
    I was more getting at just being aware of it and not going in blind sided with no idea. I agree that it can happen anywhere like a mall parking lot and such but the military is also a place it could happen as well. Just think being stationed with 7 males and you are the only female, something could potentionally happen if you are not with the right kind of people. Not pointing fingers and saying it will happen but it is a possibility and now my eyes are open. maybe the other branches have had a bigger issue with this I am not aware of the statistics off the top of my head. I would never ruin a mans career over nothing. Sadly much justice has not been given to these male and female victims but lets hope it gets better.
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    13 Dec 2012 11:02 PM
    I'd like to think that as recruiters, we are selecting the right kind of people where this has become even less of an issue. I may be naive in that thought though. We will never be able to fully weed them out, because that type of personality trait isn't something that can be easily seen, but as the overall character of our recruits increase, it should become something we have to worry less about. Most units I've been at, the relationship works like Bells described above, where everyone is treated like a sibling or a parent/child relationship. I would never want anyone to feel unsafe or uncomfortable at any CG units. I think most would agree.
    You can meet the standard, or you can set the standard. It's your choice.
    BellsUser is Offline
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    14 Dec 2012 12:32 PM
    Im at a unit thats about 17 females to 80 males.

    Its sad to say that when in my personal experience when sexual assualt is most likely to happen is when alcohol is involved.

    Trust me, if something happens, and its known... the crew isn't going to protect the perpetrator, it doesn't matter how cool they are or how great of a worker they are. That person is getting out of the military and the only decision they get left is whether or not they want sexual offender status in exchange for pleaing out or dragging out a trial.

    The bad eggs that do get in, they are still bad eggs, they can't hide their behavior... people figure it out and then they are pushed out.

    Take what you like and leave the rest behind.
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