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Dual Military
Last Post 10 Jan 2014 12:31 PM by coburns469. 4 Replies.
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coburns469User is Offline
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coburns469

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09 Jan 2014 11:43 PM
    Hello, I'm just looking for some tips or advice about family situations. I leave for bootcamp in March, and my husband is active duty in the Marines until July. We already know there is a good chance we will be separated until he gets out. But I'm nervous about our 1 year old son. I know there are a number of places I could get sent after graduating bootcamp, but would you suggest me trying to move my son up with me, or leave him until my husband can come? I've heard a little about a 2 on 2 off sliding schedule but am not sure how that works. And if I get put on a ship, (again I know they are all different) but do they stay out for a long time, or return every night. 
    My son will be in daycare Mon-Fri from 630am to 5pm for sure with my husbands schedule. 
    I just want to make the best decision for him but my biggest fear is that he will forget who I am. 
    Any advise or just personal experience is greatly appreciated!
    GearsUser is Offline
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    Gears

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    10 Jan 2014 07:43 AM
    Small Boat Stations are 2 on 2 off. You would work Mon-Tues. off Wed-Thurs work Fri-Sat-Sun off Mon/Tue ad nauseum. When you're on duty you're at the Station for a full 48 or 72 hours. Sometimes longer if there are training days.

    As far as cutters the general rule of thumb is the bigger the boat the longer the patrol. Cutters do day trips, but it's usually for maintenance or training.
    “I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine.” ― Bruce Lee
    Old Guard2User is Offline
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    10 Jan 2014 09:16 AM
    I can promise you without any shadow of a doubt, he won't forget who you are. I know it feels like he will because at 1 he probably can't remember where he put down his last toy. But you are momma. He will know you if you are apart a day or a year. Plus, there are plenty of ways for him to "see you". You can skype, send pictures, call home...

    Not at all the same and wouldn't want to compare it completely but... We lived in Alaska when my son was born. My parents lived in NJ. My dad didn't meet Colin until he was 8 months old. But he already knew him. There was a picture of Pop in a grass skirt (Pop is a bit strange) hanging right over the crib. So when they met face to face, COlin already had an idea of who he was. My mom was at our house 2 days after he was born. They spent 3 weeks together. He is so close to his grandmother. We got home for vacation one time, Colin was maybe 4. He goes running up the gangway at the airport yelling "GRANDMA GRANDMA GRANDMA!" and leapt with great enthusiasm right into Pop's arms! LOL He didn't see them very often and that was 1993 so internet wasn't available yet.

    My suggestion would be to plan on living him with dad. He has a routine, is comfortable in what he knows as his house, has daycare arrangements already, sounds like dad has more of a day job and can be home at night. I don't know if you were with your Marine when he first enlisted but the first few months to the first 2 years you are learning a lot and are expected to learn a lot. It might be tough on your heart being apart from your baby, I get that completely. But for the sake of your enlistment/career, it is a short amount of time overall and you would be better to focus on getting what you need to get done. The decision is between you and dad, so take my advice with a grain of salt. Only the 2 of you know what will be best for you and your child. I wish you all the best of luck. Thank your Marine for his service and a big thank you to you as well for stepping up and doing your time.
    Sector NY, Staten Island
    BellsUser is Offline
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    Bells

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    10 Jan 2014 10:06 AM
    I wouldn't stress to much about it in advance. When you are in boot camp there will be a comments section when you guys request districts. Just put, "I am a dual military family with my husband stationed ______. We also have a one year old and I respectfully request a colocation." Keep it short and sweet. If there's a billet available they probably won't hesitate to put you close-by
    Take what you like and leave the rest behind.
    coburns469User is Offline
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    coburns469

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    10 Jan 2014 12:31 PM
    Thankyou everyone! I know everything will come together with time, but it's so reassuring to hear from others that have already experienced the initial chaos. Knowing my son will remember me is a big thing in knowing I'm never going to let him down. I will defiently request to be close to my family. Thanks again!
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